Recently, my friend May shared a reel made by Justine Luzares that made her feel kilig (giddy).
Her sharing about feeling kilig made me realize something.
When you make new friends as an older person, you don’t really talk about love lives anymore.
This isn’t the first time I realized this, actually. I had this conversation with other friends before, when I was surprised after some new young friends said I was “secretive.”
Me? The most talkative person in most of my friend groups?
I thought about it and realized that this was probably because they often talked about boys and dating – as younger people usually do – and I had nothing to contribute, because I am past that stage.
And my older friends – most of them are partnered up already and are also past the initial dating kilig phase, so they don’t talk about that topic anymore, either.
So as a result, I don’t really know the “How I Met Your Mother” type background stories of my older friends whom I only met later in life.
And they also don’t know mine, because I don’t really want to relive my failed love stories, do I?
But it’s not really just the love stories that we don’t know much of, but a lot of other background stories, actually. With my older friends, I didn’t have to talk about my past because they already knew it – they had lived through it with me, or they were around when my milestones first happened and listened to me talk about them when they were fresh off the press.
Maybe we all need to make more of an effort to talk about our past, to make for better/deeper friendships.
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