7 Funniest Things I Did While Drunk

It was St. Patrick’s Day last Monday, and in some countries, people celebrate that by getting buzzed. I didn’t do that, but I’d like to talk about the funniest things I have done while I was drunk.

(1) I drunk-dialled my ex, and when he hung up on me, I yelled “Why won’t you talk to me???” and threw my phone across the room, where it broke… a jar. It was a Nokia 3210, so it didn’t even get a single scratch. (More Nokia stories here.)

(2) I sobbed and wailed, “Nobody loves me!” then ran to the beach. My friends ran after me because they were afraid I would drown myself in the ocean. They managed to get me back to our beach house, but I kept on trying to escape again. Sorry, friends! :-S

(3) I went for a night swim in the ocean (this was a different night from above). It was my friend’s idea. She said it was warm and we needed to cool down. And I said, “Okay!!” and we jumped right in.

(4) I ran to the locked gate of the house we were renting for an overnight team outing and tried to open it. I made so much noise that my colleagues heard me and ran after me. When they found me and told me not to run away, I scoffed at them, saying, “I was just testing the controls!” #auditorproblems

(5) We were about to sleep, so I crawled into bed with my female friends, realised that it was very warm (booze does that to you), and then asked, “Is it okay if I took off my top?” Then did just that. (I kept my bra on, okay.)

(6) I insisted that I wasn’t drunk and proved it by walking on a straight line on the floor, but I walked like Halle Berry’s Catwoman, exaggeratedly throwing my legs and hips, and said, “Look, guys, I’m Catwoman walking on the ledge!”

(7) I tried to seduce a gay friend. Let’s just say that that night proved beyond a shadow of a doubt that he’s definitely 100% NOT straight.

This all happened before I moved to Singapore, by the way. Somehow I must have gotten so mortified that I have never done anything like that ever since I moved here (much to the disappointment of my friends).

So, it’s your turn to share. Tell me, what’s the funniest thing you have ever done while you were drunk?