Unlike some people I personally know, I don’t frown upon online dating as a way to meet significant others. Also, I think people who do are way too judgmental. Hello! Welcome to modern times! Most single friends I know have dabbled in it. I have a couple of cousins who met husbands this way, so I know for a fact that it does work… just not for me. So yes, I confess, I did give it a shot… several shots, actually. Here’s why online dating and I did not work out.
(1) You’re judged based solely on your face value
Photographs are two-dimensional and don’t capture everything about a person. A not-so-cute guy could turn out to have an awesome personality or biting wit or be amazingly kind, but you wouldn’t even know this because you already swiped left on his picture. Unfortunately, the nature of virtual dating is visual dating, and first impressions last.
(2) The most ridiculous pick-up lines
Here are a few verbatim examples.
hey cutie, wassup. i just wanted to know if you knew that you were incredible? cause i just found out….lol…. ive been around beautiful, strong, goal orientated woman all my life and none of them even match “anythihng” as close to nautral beauty as you and to be honest its the truth. im sorry but im an honest man and if the shoe fits baby girl then …………….
it is your lucky day today… i have a certain amount of money to fly u over here to America so we can get married, what do u say?? come on take a chance in life…
Omg! I m sorry it took so long to get here. I have been fighting dragons, being turned into a frog and rescuing damsels in distress.
P.s. U r the princess right?
I can’t really tell that much about you from your profile, but i can conclude that you’re awesome..ly smokingly pretty! Haha. I don’t mean to flirt but damn i’d be lying if i said i didn’t have a huge, huge weakness for older girls.
I have to admit that some of them are quite clever and even flattering, but I just don’t have a thing for pick-up lines. They just seem so, I don’t know, fake and too “trying hard” I guess? Also, I’m pretty sure these were mass delivered and not personal at all.
(3) 60% of the guys on there are only looking for you-know-what
I also have samples of these that I can show you, so many more than the above, but you might go:
So better not.
Some of them are pretty up front about it, as evidenced by their lascivious names, which serves as an early warning to you so you can steer clear of them.
But some of them are unexpected. You could be carrying on what seems to be a normal decent conversation which would suddenly take a sharp turn towards “green” pastures and you can’t hit the
brakes block button fast enough.
(4) Text conversations can easily become boring and can’t hold interest
Text messages lost a lot of the nuances of personal conversations, and I find that it’s a lot easier for a text conversation to become boring. So when you don’t really know the person and he doesn’t say something interesting, then he’s not really giving you a reason to want to stick around. But some people could just be bad at expressing themselves on text, and are way better in person. But you wouldn’t know because their online persona already made you drop them.
(5) In an online environment, it takes less effort to put your best foot forward
In the getting-to-know-you phase, it is normal for both sides of the party to put their best foot forward, sometimes to the point of lying just to look good. The online setting makes it a hundred times easier to be someone you’re not, like a millionaire or something, turning it into a breeding ground for relationships based on lies.
(6) Risk of meeting up with possible psychos
You never know if the guy you’re conversing with could be a killer or rapist or a swindler, or worse. A few years ago, when my former boss found out that I was single, he warned me, “Don’t go on online dating sites. You might meet someone who will offer to pay for your travel, then put drugs in your luggage and you’ll be in trouble.” Scary. 😯
(7) Perfect-on-paper men
Then there are the men who seem to be perfect on paper. You hit it off online, and you think he’s great and risk meeting him in real life. But when you’re face to face, he’s not what he said he was, or there’s zero chemistry, or he gives you the creeps, or he’s more boring in person. I’ve had a few of these, and it was sad. It’s the saddest reason among all 7, the biggest reason that put me off online dating.
What about you, do you believe in online dating?
This is a tandem post with my friend Tyne. Read her thoughts on the same subject matter! If you want to join in, feel free to grab the top image and share your link to the post in the comments.
This post is part of the A to Z Challenge, a blog hop that goes through the alphabet for all the days of April except Sundays. Today’s feature is W for Why.